Rejected Tenchi Muyo! Timelines
As you know by now, Tenchi Muyo has several timelines (OAV, TV, Pretty Sammy, etc.); but, some just did not make the cut. So here is a list of suggested Tenchi Muyo timelines that just didn't make it to production. Enjoy!!!
This alternative version takes place in Hollywood's favorite economically disadvantaged community, South Central L.A.. Instead of being sealed in a cave, Ryoko has been locked in the trunk of a junked car for fifty years. Other characters include Mimi Hoshi, a good cop who saves the hero from a nasty beating at the hands of the Galaxy Police, and in place of Kagato, Rapmaster Kozmik K, leader of the West Betelgeuse Crips, and his ship "Sister" Soujah.
Jim Henson's TENCHI BABIES
Aw! It's cute baby Tenchi, baby Aeka, and baby Ryoko, as they scamper and play at the Masaki Day-Care Center. Chibi Washuu-chan, the 2-year-old scientific prodigy, is always creating mischevious inventions using parts from her toys. Ryoko-chan and Aeka-chan fight over Tenchi until they get so mad they wet themselves! When the urge for adventure strikes, they fly away in Ryo-oh-ki, who can transform in a flying playpen.
Quentin Tarentino's TENCHI MUYO!
Meet Tenchi, 16-year-old hit man for the Masaki gang. Aeka and Ryoko, his main babes, are always fighting over who gets to hold his gun. Other characters include Mihoshi, a cop on the take, and Sasami, the child prostitute with a heart of gold. Washuu creates designer narcotics and Ryo-oh-ki tranforms into a Ford Mustang.
ROCK ON! TENCHI!
Meet Tenchi, lead guitar and vocals for Tenchi and the Juraians, the bitchinest rock band this side of Tokyo! Drummer Ryoko and keyboardist Aeka are always trying to get Tenchi backstage! If that isn't bad enough, Kiyone and Mihoshi are the two clumsiest roadies in the history of rock. Sound engineer Washuu manages to blow out at least one speaker at each gig, and Ryo-oh-ki transforms into their bus.
Who will win Tenchi's love, as well as his virginity? Will it be Aeka, the S&M dominatrix with a good heart and a long whip? Or will it be Ryoko, the incredibly horny, four-breasted, alien hermaphrodite? Or perhaps Sasami, the impish lolita? Or maybe Ryo-oh-ki, who can transform into an inflatable doll? Meanwhile, Washuu-chan invents a never-ending series of high-tech sex toys.
Tenchi discovers Ryoko in a cave... the one he lives in! Yes, Tenchi lives in the stone age with all his friends! Washuu-chan invents fascinating devices like "fire" and "the club", and Ryo-oh-ki, their pet half-mastadon/half-rabbit, can transform into a wheel.
TENCHI DETECTIVE AGENCY
If there's a mystery to solve, Tenchi will solve it! With the help of millionaire Aeka and ex-convict Ryoko, they have the resources and know-how to solve any case! Feed Ryo-oh-ki Doo a Ryo-oh-ki Snack and she transforms into the Mystery Mobile.
MOBILE SUIT TENCHI
Can Tenchi, Gundam pilot, find romance with Jion princess Aeka? Perhaps with rogue pilot Ryoko, who flies the RX-700 "Carrot Eater Special". Guess what the "R" stands for.
A curious continuity in which Tenchi doesn't exist at all! Instead, Ryoko and Aeka fight for the love of Sasami, who sounds surprisingly loud and whiny...
MARRIED... WITH TENCHI
Tenchi marries Aeka and moves to suburban New Jersey. But what will happen when his old flame, Ryoko, moves in next door, with her wacky mom, Washuu? Ryo-oh-ki transforms into something amusing every week.
Yee-haw! Let's saddle up with Cowboy Tenchi as he tries to protect the Masaki Ranch from that cattle rustlin' varmint, Cool Hand Kagato! Perhaps Mihoshi, U.S. Marshal, can help! Ryo-oh-ki the Cowbit transforms into a pick-up truck and Washuu-chan invents new ways to cook beef.
RYOUKO AND AYEKA
After Ryouko blows away a guy molesting Ayeka in a parking lot, the pair goes on a harrowing cross-Japan road trip on the run from the law. On the way, they gain deep insights into life, the universe, and each other. The story ends when it belatedly occurs to the girls that either one of them could take on the entire Japanese SDF without breaking a sweat.
VAMPIRE PRINCESS SASAMI
Sasami's vampire blood awakens on her 713th birthday, and she begins speaking entirely in cryptic poetic allusions. Ryo-Ohki dons a mask and accompanies her as her mysterious guardian. Sasami continues to cook for the "family," but the menu is suddenly restricted to human blood. Rather than learn to cook for themselves, the gang adjusts.
On a station out in the depths of space, all alone in the night, Captain Tenchi and his sidekick, Commander Kiyone, struggle to understand the war between the First Ones that threatens to tear apart the galaxy. It turns out that Shadow Princess Ayeka and the Vorlon ambassador Ryoukosh are fighting over who gets to marry the Captain.
One day, the girls are called into Tenchi's room to hear a stunning announcement: he and Ranma Saotome have agreed to trade harems.
THE MASAKIS OF HAZZARD
Tenchi and his cousin Nobiuki are on parole from their whiskey running days, though they dream of one day joining the NASCAR circut. They live with Masaki patriarch Uncle Yosho on the Masaki farm in Hazzard county along with Cousins Ryoko, Ayeka and Sasami. They're also constantly on the run from Sheriff Kyone P. Coltraine, bumbling deputy Mihoshi, and "Boss" Washu. When the chase is on, Cousin Sasami's pet transforms into Tenchi and Nobiuki's stock car, the General Ryo-oki.
NEON GENESIS TENCHIMUYOLON
Tenchi Masaki is a reluctant 14-year-old pilot of a giant robot defending the Earth from invasion by Angels. Joining him on his adventures are two other pilots; Ayeka Jurainami, quiet, subdued, and mysterious; and Ryoko Langley Soyouze, out-going, loud, and uninhibited. Also serving to defend the Earth are Tenchi's father, Commander Nobiuki Masaki, Captain Kyone (who takes Tenchi and Ryoko under her wing and has a pet pen-bit named Ryo-Ryo-oki), and scientist Dr. Washu.
THE REALLY ODD COUPLE
Neat freak Kyone Unger is tossed out of her apartment by her husband. With nowhere to go, she moves in with her best friend, slob Mihoshi Madison. Will they learn to live together? Or will they drive each other insane?
SUPERDIMENTIONAL FORTRESS RYO-OKI
Only Sasami's song can save mankind from the invading giant alien Ryokos. Singer Lynn-Sasami and First Officer Ayeka fight for the love of fighter pilot Tenchi.
Test pilots Ayeka Dyson and half-alien Ryoko Goa Boman compete for the funding of the new fighter and the heart of handsome record producer Tenchi. But what's the secret of Ryoko's past?
Tenchi is a reporter who wants to be a war correspondant. While out one day with a real war correspondant, Nobiyuki, he finds Ayeka, a singer for the Marduk, a strange alien Race... Tenchi can't decide who he likes, Ayeka or Ryoko Jina, the best Valkyrie Ace that the UN. Spacy has.
MIHOSHI AND THE BRAIN
The misadvantures of lab mice "Brain" Washu and Mihoshi as they try to take over the world.
SCIENCE NINJA TEAM TENCHIMAN
Eagle Tenchi, Condor Ryoko, Swan Ayeka, Swallow Sasami, and Owl Mihoshi battle the evil Galactor and the mysterious Berg Washu aboard their airship, the God Ryo-Oki.
The hyper-kinetic adventures of Tenchi Masaki and his friends!! When Kagato attacks Namek can Tenchi tap the spiritual energy to become a Super-Saiya-Jurain? Also featuring Ryoko in the role of Kuririn (imagine her bald) and Washu as Kamesenin!! Don't forget the new Tenchi Z Movie!! What happens when Aeka (killed in the last movie) returns as a Metal Cyborg? Featuring Ryo-oh-ki as the Big Gehtti Star!!
The Goddess Athena has reincarnated in the body of the young Jurain princess Sasami. Now her warriors gather to determine who shall wear the Golden armor of Sagittarius. But in the middle of the fight Phoenix Ryoko appears to steal the legendary armor!! Pegasus Tenchi, Dragon Washu, Cygnus Mihoshi and Andromeda Aeka must don their mystic armor to stop Ryoko and the re-incarnation of Ares... Kagato!! Featuring Ryo-ok-ki as Sanctuary!!
TENCHI PON POKO
The Cute 'n Cuddly Ryo-oh-ki's habitat is threatened by a land development. Matriarchal Washuu unites them against the threat. But will their laziness and gluttony lead to inaction? Or will they follow headstrong, young leader Ryoko into tragedy..
Young Jurai knight Tenchi Masaki must learn the way of the Force and learn how to become a true knight so that he can defeat the evil Darth Kagato and the ultimate weapon: the DEATH SOUJA!
Tenchi must escape his home planet of Terratooine with his master Yosho Wan Kinobi. They find unlikely help in the form of smuggler Hans Ryoko, and her trusty ship, Millenium Ryo-ohki. Directed by the smart and sensible bot C3PKiyone and the stupid yet brave bot, R2Mihoshi2. Together these intrepid adventurers rescue Princess Aeka from the clutches of Darth Kagato.
THE TENCHIANA JONES TRILOGY
Juraiders of a Lost Art: Famous archeologist Tenchiana Jones searches for the location to a five-thousand-year-old cave supposedly containing the mummified remains to an ancient demon. To help him, he looks up his old girlfriend Ryoko, whose family has had some connection with the cave, including an ancient medallion with three embedded gems. Traveling to the Middle East and enlisting the help of dark-skinned Mihoshi, they attempt to avoid Kagato and his Nazi minions.
Tenchiana Jones and the Shrine of Doom: Haughty singer Ayeka is dragged unwillingly into a second adventure of Tenchiana Jones, along with enthusiastic sidekick Sasami. This time, the trio uncover a secret society of underground worshippers, who worship the great god Ryo-oh-ki.
Tenchiana Jones and the Last Crusades: Tenchiana Jones helps his father Yosho in a search for the Holy Grail. This movie features the return of Mihoshi and also a prominent part for Tenchiana's colleague Professor Kiyone, whom we only saw a bit of in the first movie. (The repartee between the two is priceless.) Also in this movie is the mysterious but intelligent woman Washuu, who also appears to seek the Grail. Is she friend or foe?
THE CALL OF WASHULU
Intrepid explorer Tenchi Masaki and his band of stalwart allies discover a secret passage deep beneath the Masaki Catacombs. While searching the dank and ryo-ohki infested tunnels, they come across slumbering form of dread Washulu. To their horror, she awakens from her eon-long slumber and insists on being referred to as "Washulu-chan".
Follow the hysterical antics of seven island castaways. With Mihoshi as ... Oh, YOU know, Kiyone as the Skipper, Ryoko as the Movie Star, Sasami as Mary Ann, Washu as the Professor, Tenchi as the Millionaire, Ayeka as his Fiancee who argues with the Movie Star ALL the time, and a constantly drunk on carrot brandy Ryo-ohki as the Wreck of the Minnow.
Thanks for the following people who created this list:
Ryan Mathews (email@example.com), Ross TenEyck (firstname.lastname@example.org), Mike Breen (email@example.com), Damien Roc (firstname.lastname@example.org), J.H. (email@example.com), (firstname.lastname@example.org), Anne Packrat (email@example.com), Wei-Hwa Huang (firstname.lastname@example.org), Jesse Chang (email@example.com), and Rob (firstname.lastname@example.org).
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